Boys usually stop altar serving in high school because the role stops fitting them. They're serving next to much younger children, there's no next step to grow into, and they have no group of peers or men to serve with. Parishes keep high school boys altar serving by giving them a role set apart from younger servers, a brotherhood of boys their own age, faithful men to mentor them, and real ownership of the work.
Here's why it happens, and seven ways to fix it, whether or not you use a formal program.
You probably know the scene. Boys who served faithfully all through grade school still come to Mass with their families. They just aren't at the altar anymore. They're in the pew. The Leaven described exactly this at St. Ann Parish in Prairie Village, Kansas: every year the servers would "disappear from the sanctuary" as freshmen, and the same thing was happening in parishes across the archdiocese.
It matters because of when it happens. Young men between 14 and 18 are at their most vulnerable; this is when their values and priorities are formed. Serving keeps a boy close to the altar and close to his priest during exactly those years. Losing him from the sanctuary at 14 is a real loss, and it doesn't have to happen.
Why do boys stop altar serving in high school?
These are the reasons parish leaders commonly report. None of them is a mystery, and each one points to something you can change.
They're serving next to fifth graders
Most server programs are built for children. To a 15-year-old, serving beside much younger kids can feel like a step backward. Catholic Stand makes this point: a ninth or tenth grader can feel a little too old to serve "at the same level" as young kids.
The role stops feeling like an honor
In many parishes the job is the same at 16 as it was at 9. There's no next step, and nothing marks him as the more experienced server. What felt special in fourth grade starts to feel routine.
There's no brotherhood
Teenage boys go where their friends are. Serving alone, on a rotating schedule, competes poorly with sports, jobs and friends. If serving means showing up by himself, he will eventually stop showing up.
Too few men to imitate
Boys this age watch men closely. If no men in the parish visibly invest in them, the implicit message is that they have no value to offer.
Nobody hands them responsibility
When adults run everything, boys experience serving as following orders rather than as something that belongs to them. Teenagers rise to responsibility. They drift away from supervision.
None of this means boys have lost interest in the faith. It means the structure stopped fitting them.
7 ways to keep high school boys altar serving
Each of these works on its own, with or without a formal program. Together, they make serving something a high school boy wants to be part of.
1. Give high school servers a role set apart from younger servers
High school servers need a role that is clearly a step up. When the older boys are visibly different, serving becomes something to grow into instead of something to grow out of.
In practice, reserve one Sunday Mass for the high schoolers to serve together. Mark the step up visibly. At the Church of the Holy Spirit in Plattsmouth, Nebraska, the Southern Nebraska Register reports that the high school Templars wear red cassocks instead of black, with longer, more detailed surplices than the simple ones the younger boys wear. You can also entrust experienced older servers with roles like crucifer or thurifer. Liturgical roles and vesture follow your diocese's norms and your own judgment as pastor.
Start this month: pick the Mass, and tell the boys it's theirs.
2. Build a brotherhood, not just a schedule
Boys stay for each other. When high school servers serve as a group, rather than as individuals on a rotation, they show up for their brothers as much as for the schedule.
Put the high schoolers on the altar together, at the same Mass, as often as you can. Then give them regular time together that isn't liturgical: food, games, time outdoors. Friendship formed after Mass is what brings them back to the sacristy next Sunday.
Start this month: host one gathering after Mass, with food.
3. Put faithful men beside them
Boys become men by watching men. Recruit two or three lay men of good character to mentor the boys, chaperone gatherings, and be what the Templars FAQ calls "worthy men to imitate in walking the Christian life."
These men don't need to be liturgy experts. They need to be present, steady and faithful. They also protect your time as pastor, because they carry most of the day-to-day load. Every adult involved completes your diocese's safe environment requirements, with no exceptions. As the Templars confrère sheet puts it, "This is to be strictly enforced for the safety and protection of the youth, our priests, and ourselves."
Start this month: ask two men by name, after Mass, in person.
4. Let the boys run it
Teenagers take ownership of what is actually theirs. The Templars confrère sheet puts the principle simply: "Treat them as men, not as boys, and they will strive to meet your expectations."
In practice, that means elected officers, meetings the boys run themselves, service projects the boys choose, and the boys deciding who does what at Mass. The adults advise. They don't run it. In Plattsmouth, the confrères helped the boys set up their meetings and serving schedule at first, then stepped back as the boys took those tasks over.
The pastor there has seen the difference:
"I think they're paying a lot more attention to the Mass," he said, "and I can tell that that reverence is very important for them. When they were younger, in junior high, they did a good job, but now they're taking ownership, and taking pride in it and wanting to do a good job for God."
— Father Sean Timmerman, pastor of the Church of the Holy Spirit in Plattsmouth, Nebraska, quoted in the Southern Nebraska Register
Start this month: let the boys elect a leader and plan their own next gathering.
5. Give them a rhythm beyond Sunday
Serving is the anchor, but one hour a week isn't enough to make a brotherhood. Boys need a steady rhythm of serving, fellowship, service to others and prayer.
Templars calls this rhythm the Work of the Order. It's one proven model you can borrow:
| Work | How often | What it looks like |
|---|---|---|
| Serve at the altar | Weekly | Sunday Mass |
| Build the brotherhood | Quarterly | Organized fellowship |
| Give of yourself for others | Quarterly | Charitable service project |
| Attend to spiritual growth | Annually | Retreat |
| Run the chapter | Monthly | Boy-led business meeting |
Source: Templars Parent Info Sheet.
Start this month: put the next fellowship night and the next service project on the calendar.
6. Recruit in the spring of 8th grade
The best time to keep a high school server is before he quits. The Templars FAQ advises recruiting 8th graders during their second semester, because recruiting them then "is often more successful than recruiting them in high school." Catch boys before the habit breaks, and they never have to come back.
Recruit personally, by name. Templars' first recruiting step starts with "making a list of the male teenagers in your parish." A bulletin notice rarely moves a 14-year-old. A personal invitation from his pastor or a man he respects often does. David James makes the same point about personal recruiting in his altar server program guide on Patheos.
Start this month: write down the name of every 8th-grade and high school boy in the parish.
7. Bring parents in early
Parents drive, schedule and encourage. If they understand what their son is joining, they become your best recruiters.
Tell parents who the adults are, what the commitment is, and what their son gains. A one-page handout helps. Templars offers a parent info sheet you can use as a model.
Start this month: send every family on your list a short note before you invite their son.
Ideas from other parishes and programs
Templars isn't the only good answer to this problem. Several parishes and programs have found their own ways to keep older servers, and they're worth knowing.
- Knights of St. Tarcisius (St. Ann Parish, Prairie Village, Kansas). A parish faith formation director and a deacon built a boys' program around fun, fellowship, formation and a touch of vocational motivation, with monthly meetings and four ranks: Squire, Knights' Apprentice, Knight and Grand Knight. Read The Leaven's story.
- Knights of the Altar (used in many parishes). A rank-based server program for boys who have received First Holy Communion, from age seven, that advances servers by competence and faithful service. It's a strong way to build a pipeline in the younger grades. See the Knights of the Altar handbook from Vocation Ministry.
- The junior sacristan idea. Catholic Stand suggests giving proven high school servers a recognized senior role between server and adult sacristan.
- The "aspirational arc." The Patheos guide encourages programs that grow with the kids, so each age has new milestones and the older servers teach the younger ones.
These approaches have something in common, and it's the same list above: a role set apart, a brotherhood, men to imitate and real ownership. Templars is one way to put all of it in place in a group built only for high school boys.
What about girls who serve?
Girls who serve at the altar are welcome and valued in parishes across the country. This guide focuses on boys because that's the drop-off pastors keep asking about.
Templars is a program for male teenagers. As the Templars FAQ says, it "is not designed to exclude female altar servers"; it is designed to encourage young men to serve at the altar. For parishes that want something similar for high school young women, the FAQ recommends Handmaids: Keepers of the Lamp, a sisterhood for high school young women.
How Templars helps parishes keep high school boys serving
Templars – Knights of the Holy Temple is a Catholic program for teenage boys: a fraternity for young men ages 14 to 18 that forms them into Catholic gentlemen through altar serving, brotherhood, service and prayer. It puts all seven of the steps above in place at once, so you don't have to build them from scratch. Templars is a program of Unfinished, Inc., a Catholic 501(c)(3).
Who does what. You serve as chaplain. Two or more lay men, called confrères, mentor the boys and chaperone. The brothers themselves serve as officers and run the chapter.
How many boys. A chapter of 5 to 7 boys is the right size to start.
Your time. According to the Templars FAQ, a chapter "will take a few of your hours during the launch stage, but lay adult men in the parish will be the chief contributors."
Support. Once you have your Launch Kit, a Chapter Success Coach contacts you to plan your parish launch. You also get GoTemplars, the chapter management software, and regular quarterly check-ins.
Cost. The free Launch Kit includes two copies of the Rule of the Order, two Chaplain & Confrère Manuals, 15 Pocket Guides to Christian Masculinity, 15 launch event invitation cards, 30 QR code sign-up cards and two posters. All chapter materials are 100% free for your parish and families. Launching a chapter of 10 costs $1,950, but the parish isn't charged; donors cover it through Pay It Forward and Sponsor My Chapter.
Where it comes from. Templars began in 1999, when a young Indiana priest noticed that the male teenagers in his parish "possessed a power and influence that lay dormant, especially within the Church." He offered them a different path, and they chose it. Today Templars has 40 chapters. As the Most Rev. James S. Wall, Bishop of Gallup, put it: "Templars is a proven and fruitful model of formation and maturation for its male teenage membership."
One parish's story. The Church of the Holy Spirit in Plattsmouth, Nebraska, launched its chapter in spring 2025 with eight members, freshmen through juniors. According to the Southern Nebraska Register, they are now the exclusive servers at the parish's 10:30 a.m. Sunday Mass.
Contact us to get your free Launch Kit
A Chapter Success Coach will be in touch about your parish launch.
How to start at your parish
- Contact us to get the free Launch Kit through the contact form. A Chapter Success Coach will follow up about timing and fit.
- Commission two or more lay men as confrères to mentor the boys.
- Make a list of the high school boys in your parish, plus 8th graders in their spring semester, and invite each one personally.
- Launch. Begin serving together at your chosen Mass and start the rhythm of the Work of the Order.
Frequently asked questions
Why do boys stop altar serving in high school?
Most boys stop because the role stops fitting them, not because they've lost their faith. In high school they are often still serving beside much younger children, with no next step to grow into, no group of friends to serve with and few men to imitate. Giving them a set-apart role, a brotherhood and real responsibility addresses each of those reasons.
At what age should high school altar servers be recruited?
Recruit them in the spring of 8th grade. The Templars FAQ notes that recruiting 8th graders in their second semester "is often more successful than recruiting them in high school," because you reach them before the habit of serving breaks. Templars members are 14 to 18. If most of your interested boys are under 14, talk it through with a Chapter Success Coach.
How much of a pastor's time does a program for high school servers take?
Less than most pastors expect, if lay men carry the load. According to the Templars FAQ, starting a chapter "will take a few of your hours during the launch stage, but lay adult men in the parish will be the chief contributors." The confrères mentor and chaperone, and the boys themselves run the chapter.
What does it cost to start a Templars chapter?
Nothing for your parish or families. The Launch Kit and all chapter materials are free. Launching a chapter of 10 costs $1,950, but the national Templars team doesn't charge it to the parish. Donors cover it through the Pay It Forward and Sponsor My Chapter programs.
Is a program for teenage boys meant to exclude girls who serve?
No. Templars is a program for male teenagers, but in the words of its FAQ, it "is not designed to exclude female altar servers." It is designed to encourage young men to serve at the altar. For high school young women, Templars recommends Handmaids: Keepers of the Lamp, a sisterhood for high school young women.
How many boys do you need to start?
A chapter of 5 to 7 boys is the right size to start. You don't need a large youth group. A handful of committed boys, two or more faithful men and a Mass the boys can call their own are enough to begin.
Ready to keep your high school boys at the altar?
Your boys don't need to be talked into the faith. They need a place at the altar that fits who they are becoming. Templars gives your parish everything to make that happen, at no cost to you or your families.
Contact us to get your free Launch Kit
A Chapter Success Coach will be in touch about your parish launch. You can also see what's in the free Launch Kit.